When someone shuts themself down it doesn’t mean they’re doing it because they were meant to act that way. We don’t know what they are like, what their background is, what they’ve been through. So don’t accuse or make assumptions that they don’t want to open up and act like that on purpose.

When you casually accuse, have you ever thought about how they feel? they may be going through a severe trauma that makes them unable to open up.

I remember someone who could easily accuse that him feel neglected and that he was talking to someone “rubbish.” only because he was dissatisfied because the person he was talking to closed herself off from him.

Only from a short conversation with arbitrarily that person can accuse without thinking about the feelings of the person being spoken to. The person claimed that he was very mature which in fact his attitude showed that he was very immature.

Never assume anything unless you know the person deeply. If that person shuts you off, it may take time for that person to trust you, to open up to you. It’s not that they act that way because they are mean or rude.

I’ve had several encounters with people like that and in the end they showed me that they were actually the best friends who supported me when I was feeling down or needed help. I admit it takes time for them to adjust to new people and it’s not easy for them.

They also admit that sometimes they feel bad because of their attitude but it’s all because in the past they have been hurt a lot by people who made them shut themselves and feel insecure.

Don’t assume especially if it’s someone you just met. It’s not necessarily that the first introductions are bad, so they’re definitely bad. Sometimes it takes time to get into it all. In the end, they may become a helper or a good friend that you never thought before.